It’s like someone made a list of my life, my existence. Okay, except for #4. That’s just creepy.
This year, two of my three Christmas wishes came true. My first one was to get the opportunity to work with my friend, Kelly. Long story short, we were supposed to work together and then we weren’t and as of midnight last night, we are going to work together. I’m excited and I hope there aren’t any more changes, otherwise, it’ll be one out of three Christmas wishes this year.
My second one, I don’t really want to talk about it. It might still be an unfolding story or it could be one of those TV shows that never goes beyond the pilot episode. Who knows?
My third and final wish was to spend a quiet Christmas Eve on my own. Yes, completely on my own.
As destiny would have it, I have to work over the holiday period, starting on Christmas Day. This meant that our highly anticipated Melbourne and Tasmania trip would be out of the question for me. I was meant to go with Gerald (flatmate), Erin (BFF), and John (Erin’s hubby and flatmate’s brother). I was kinda disappointed that I’m missing out on this but on the bright side – yes, there is always a positive to everything! – that meant an opportunity to have the house to myself on Christmas Eve! Not that I don’t want to be around my friends or anything, but there are just those days when I want time alone. Plus, you know how everything gets so frenetic at Christmas with all that shopping and partying. It gets a bit too noisy inside my head sometimes and I just want a time out. Besides, those things aren’t what Christmas is really all about.
About two years ago, this had been my grand master plan – to travel on my own on Christmas Day and not tell anyone where I was headed. It didn’t happen because at the last minute, I agreed to cook Noche Buena and celebrate with friends right at this very apartment where I now live. (Little did I know then I’d end up living here but that’s a whole different story).
I didn’t have any deep and meaningful introspection today. All I did was wake up in the morning, have tinapa for breakfast and then head to the shops to buy some vegetables and fruit. By 10:30AM I was just lying on the sofa doing absolutely nothing. I loved it! The rest of the day was spent preparing my Noche Buena for one. Just because I was on my own didn’t mean I was lonely. I had texts, calls, emails, Facebook and Viber messages to keep me company.
Okay, so some of you might be feeling sad for me. Don’t. I wanted to do it. Feel sad for people who have to spend Christmas alone but don’t really want to. I feel sad for them. I can’t explain it but it’s not about trying to be different or being papansin. I have never been about that and I never will. I do have my introverted moments and this is one of them.
If there is anything I’ve learned tonight, it’s that when you strip down this holiday to its barest, you finally see its real meaning and what significance it should hold in your life. Why are we celebrating Christmas anyway? We are celebrating the birth of Jesus – the dude who’ll grow up only to die young so that our sins will be forgiven. So far, this is the Christmas that I’ve felt closest to the birthday boy and I wouldn’t change that for the world. 🙂